lust but not least

Yesterday the Addams' family opened a new store in the second most important town of the region I live in. It's a couple of hours' away from here, so we had to leave town quite early in the morning to get there on time and to work like dogs before and during the opening ceremony. Actually I had already worked a lot for that, as the ceremony and the party after that are things which I personally take care of.

This is my third new opening since I've worked for the Addams and it's the second opening this year. Last one was in March, in a village not too far from here.

I had heard this time would have been harder and much more tiresome - apart from the distance - because of the many many things that hadn't worked out well in the previous months. Problems regarding almost everything, from the goods to the building, from the shop assistants' uniforms to the stands and racks, from licenses and authorizations to software bugs.
So, when we got there we had no surprise in finding all the guys in a daze.

In addition, the air conditioning system was out of order. Considering that the temperature outside was about 34° C, no wind with 400% humidity and that the store has huge windows (=let the sunshine in...) imagine how "cool" we all looked.. At 7 AM, me and Frook looked fine: we had nice dresses, nice high-heeled shoes, nice hairdos and so on. At 9 AM we had started looking a bit less shining. At 1 PM, our makeup melting, we looked like homeless raccoons. At 4 PM, hungry, tired, sweating copiously, dishevelled, totally worn down, we were ready to star in an episode of Lost.

The store opened at noon, after the usual speech from Gomez Addams (K.o.M's dad, a man compared to whom Mr.Magoo is a lovely handsome easygoing lad. A man who makes Uncle Scrooge look like the most selfless and generous benefactor in the universe) following which I learned it's better to wear a look of intense admiration and interest. If tears of emotion come, it's even better, but it's not essential.

After that, the customers all fought their way to the buffet, behaving as in a story from the Bible. No, not like Moses and his friends towards the promised land, a bit more like the grasshoppers of the Egyptian plague.
After less than 20 mins the tables were empty. You could hear a sound as if the wind was blowing through the desert... woooooooooooohhhhhhhhh... Impressive, uh?

I always get quite astonished about people's behaviour when it comes to free food or gadgets.

Besides, the Addams usually buy some thousands of small plants to be given as a gift to the customers. Some girls in pretty uniforms stand beside a green table and give the flowers to the ladies. Or so it should be if people didn't act like they were mental... Yesterday I saw two men in their late forties (beer belly, almost bald head and stuff) fiercely arguing about who was the first in line to get a tiny petunia. One of them was almost shouting that his wife was pregnant and she would have died if he hadn't taken her the plant.. Folks, I'm talking about a small, tiny, 50 cent of Euro petunia. My gosh..

The 3 little pigs (my boss, the Second Son and the K.o.M) were frantic and tired, and I reckon they really were emotional about all the circus. You know, all the talks about "we're a family, we're the largest store chain in the region still we're so modest and human - yeah, you bet - and our clerks are all happy and smiling - yeah, you bet n.2 - and we're growing a halo 'cause - light a candle and pray - we're SAINTS!"

I know that after The Company Ravishing Annual Party nothing can surprise you anymore, but believe me, it was a science fiction-horror movie. I didn't even have to pay a ticket to see it!!
Ok, I lost some 6 pounds from the sweating and fasting, got so tired that I fell asleep at 7 PM with my face buried in the dinner plate and slept so badly I'm aching all over. But isn't it a small price to pay for such a show?

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Title from: Hotel California - The Eagles