Monday, March 06, 2006

 

They're all together ooky...

I've told you some things about the people I work for. I've told you about the Company Ravishing Annual Party and their attitude about that. But that's not enough. There are some peculiar things about this firm that I feel I must share with everyone of you. The company that currently pays for my cats' food and for my Harry Potter dvd's is run by a family. Something in between the Addams, the Simpsons (only Homer and Granpa) and Dickens' Scrooge.

The father He's totally nuts. And I don't mean the kind of funny man who people would laugh at.. I'd say he's more of the "get on your knees and worship me, I'm the king of the universe" kind of dangerous crazy ones. Which is not so uncommon here in Italy - just take a look at our Premier. Anyway, he wears these glasses with a ridiculous frame with a colour that can be anything from Canary Yellow to Vomit Green and paces the rooms like a frantic ogre, which is not a good sight on a Monday morning. One of his favourite activities is to scare the shit out of everyone of us. Believe me, I'm not so easy to scare - and this has always been quite a problem with people like these - but as my contract has to be renewed in a few months I must keep calm and try not to "roundkick him to death" as some of the lads here would say.

The son #1 AKA my boss. He's 35, pretty disgusting, and with all the symptoms of a severe coke addiction. Otherwise, they could just be the first signs of the family madness, don't know. Anyway he works harder than anyone else here and it wouldn't be fair of me if I said he's just an asshole. Which he is. Most of the times. But he's not so bad, in the end.

Know you all expected the Holy Ghost to be the 3rd... but here he comes The son #2 In fact there's not so much to say about him. He's 33 and is abroad for most of the time. Most of all because he's so lazy he'd die if he really had to work. Travelling around the globe purchasing undescribably crappy items is not really a job for him. It's more like making all your relatives' effort about this firm worth a damn.

The son #3 Better known as the King of Morons. Short. Ugly as no one can say. Stinky. Ignorant. Bossy. 31 years of ugliness concentrated in a disturbing, disgusting freak. And he'll be my only co-worker during this week, as my boss is on a holiday and K.o.M needs help to sort out some problems. I mean JOB problems. As for the rest he's hopeless. This morning he showed up with an apple-green sweater worn INSIDE OUT (labels and seams happily on sight) on a deep-green face, try to figure the impact on my stomach.

Sometimes I wonder if they're like the Pharaos, you know cousin-married-to-cousin and stuff, so that after a few generations the results are some unbelievable freaks.. Go figure. This must be the only explanation. I'm working for Tutankhamon's nephews.
So.Please. Come and rescue me out of this pyramid. Do not believe to those silly rumors about curses. There's nothing like that.

I hope.

Comments:
Oh my God, Phi... you are representing the great and fantastic SME (small and medium enterprises) Italian model!
The winning model of the italian post-war period! What a crap! We cannot really navigate away from the actual mediocrity until these comedy-style bosses pass away.
Am I a little bit rude? Yes, I think so.
Now I can imagine what your "virtual abroad" is! :-)
Be confident. There is a not-so-silent large minority of globalised italians (inside and outside Italy) working hard for a better and bright future.
I am still writing in english here because I respect your international audience. And, finally, I am very proud of your efforts in communicating a different perspective of Italians. How can I help you?

Take care!
 
I still read your blog Phi. Just been too busy to update mine. I got into a bit of trouble over it. Whoops! Keep writing, I check in once a week or more. It's dawn here and I just got up to go jogging. I'm on a keep fit push!
 
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