Monday, June 12, 2006


You gotta be cool, you gotta be calm...

The skin on my back doesn't look like a giant pizza anymore, but my body doesn't seem to recover from godknowswhat. While I'm trying to collect the money to take some bloody, ehm, blood test, my liver has decided to go on a strike. I'm always tired and weary, sleepy and weak. Now I'm at the desk but I'd rather be in bed, taking a nap, as I can hardly keep my eyes open.
Wednesday I'm taking my English exam. I'm afraid I won't make it, as I haven't studied that much and I can't seem to concentrate (see above).

Lots of people have come and gone in the last two weeks. Some of them made me smile, some of them had me so mad I could have killed them. Some of them have let me down very badly. Some have pleasantly surprised me.

Me, I've deserved kisses and slaps on the face just like everybody else.

So the following is not exactly a complaint, nor a blame; I simply think people do what they do. Most of the times they hurt you because they're hurt.
But sometimes it's more than one can bear. So no criticism. Just a matter-of-factly way to describe how life's going here..

5) Thomas has proved himself to be very disrespectful, to say the least, and with a tendency to make up stories in his own brain, regardlessly of the most elementary truth, that borders on insanity. He's a guru in making up fights, act as a drama queen, insult you in both subtle and direct ways and then play the part of the tiny blossom who's been hurt by the cruel and chilly witch from the North (me, in this case). Unbearable. Much more so because I've been so silly to let him behave like this for months before deciding I'd had enough.

4) The sweatshirt man seems to be gone for a while. He's a good guy but really needs a shrink. The more people get closer, the more he treats them like crap for his rage and fear of being left alone. And when obviously most of the people leave, he gets angrier and sadder because "what did I tell you? nodoby loves me..." A shrink. Now. Please. We could arrange a group discount for him, Thomas and...

3) Mr.Charmes is spiting in the face of God. Just hope God's looking somewhere else. Or has a huge handkerchief and a very bad memory.

2) Bee has come back. I still don't know how I feel about seeing her again. I've missed her so much, as she says she's missed me, but I'm having some trouble in forgiving her. She's too easy on some things, and I'm not so good in letting go. We'll see what happens.

1) My American friend's friend must be completely nuts. After scaring the sh** out of me with that email about testaments and stuff, he's decided to "stop messing with xxx's life" and disappeared. Simple as this. Now I still don't have any news about anything, and I can't do anything.

If I gave credit to anyone of the above mentioned crazy people, I'd be locked in a room with padded walls. To avoid this, I'm baking tons of pizza, planting begonias and basil on my terrace and taking care of my home. Tonight I'll be at a friend's house to watch the football game on tv. I'll take an apple crumb and the best of my smiles. You won't be able to tell which one of the two is the sweetest...
Title from: Des'ree - You gotta be

It looks like you have a talent for going deeply in other people psychology; the risk in doing that (consciously or not) is that you always find what you don't want to find.

May I help you with your blood(y) exams? As a famous vampire, of course my help will be a bite on the neck :-)
..I don't know if it's a "talent" or what..I actually find it very natural to look at people trying to understand them, to know them better.. it's not something I do on purpose..
And yes, you're right, this sometimes has me taking a look at the Dorian Gray's portrait that everybody has upstairs, but it doesn't bother me that much, in the end. As Jack Lemmon said in "some like it hot".. NOBODY'S PERFECT!!
I'm waiting for a pic of your fangs!! :-))
I love Des'ree song!
apple crumble! apple crumble!! now!
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