Monday, June 19, 2006


Teacher, there are things...

As I said, I had my English test on Wednesday.

The night before the test had been spent on restless thoughts and worries, thanks to a harsh discussion I'd had and to some hours of non-stop crying, and the following morning I was tired beyond imagination.

The exam started with British precision at 9.00 am, and went on until lunch break, at 1.00 pm.

During this time I succeded in:
1) falling asleep with my head on the desk. The girl who was sitting next to me thought I was "very relaxed".. God help
2) writing one of the best compositions of my life, which oozed with irony and wit in every word. And my only thought was "it would fit the blog perfectly... will they let me have a copy?.."
3) deciding I'm too old to take any exam. I even failed the blood tests, what the heck did I want to do there????

After lunch, there was another 80 (yeah, EIGHTY) questions about grammar and use of English. At the end of the test I was so weary I could hardly think straight. Nonetheless I seemed to be able of thinking in some way, as my mind went on producing nightmarish pictures of me being laughed at by all the teachers and the students in the school.

The last part of the test, on Thursday, was about listening and speaking (things we all should be supposed to do exactly in THAT order). The speaking test was scheduled in the afternoon, so before going to school I took a break in a local cafeteria with Bee and her daughter.. and it took me a breathless run to be back there on time.

The girl who had been designed to be my partner was already waiting for me in the hall. I was a bit nervous and therefore a bit more silent than usual, so when I got in the room I just said "Ciao"
(I want to make this point very clear: I'm Italian, all the students there were Italian, the test was made for "English Second Language Students". Me and that girl, we were ALONE in the room. Clear? ok. fine.)

She couldn't say anything nearly as trivial as "ciao", of course. She couldn't just nod and smile silently meaning "hi, I'm nervous too, let's just hope we can go through it". Not at all. She spoke, lightspeed, almost without breathing. What I say, spoke. She erupted as a volcano, she exploded like a rocket. "ohmypartnerfinallyhasarrived!!!!!!Iwasalittlebitworriedyousee!!!excusemeifIspeakEnglishrightfromthestartbutifIstartspeakingItalianthanit'sover!!!!!!"

ok. If this was meant to frighten me to death, guys, that's exactly what was happening.

A second later I was sitting in front of three-women-three, pale as ghosts, who asked us the typical questions you expect to hear in a test like that. You know, things like "what is the decision you've made that you can say has changed your life?" or "do you think God exists? if so, why am I here and not on a tropical beach?"

After 15 minutes of this wonderfully enjoyable repertoire, I was allowed to leave. What a pity... time goes by so fast when you're having fun with friends, uh?

Now. The exam is over, I won't have the results until September. A whole summer during which I'll spread my awful English around the web, until The Judgment comes.

Watch out, you people out there. It could be infectious!

Today's title: One more try - George Michael

I would have said "oozed irony and wit from every word". You English is just a tiny step away form being nearly perfect.
My most sincere congratulations.
I could fall for a girl speaking and writing such good English, actually.
I just could.
Grazie per essere passata.
E' un blog solo di passaggio non avrei il tempo di gestirlo anche se può sembrare il contrario e come hai ben notato le dida sono il mio forte, non sono una romanziera.

Bonne chance à toi
we all hope for the best, shall
we met at Julliette place tomorrow
for a cup of tea.

ps.pls do not care about the
flattering Pizzinelli, he is
a terrible 'marpione'
bella scoperta. bella davvero.
grazie per gli auguri,è stato un vero piacere ricevere una tua your writing' style.

"some hours of non-stop crying"
That's very bad.
The exam is just an exam, after all.
Emanuele: the tears were shed because of something else.. The exam IS just an exam.. Thanks for stopping by, I was just wondering where you were! :-)
Phi, I simply didn't express myself properly.
I wasn't implying a relation between your tears and the exam!
I was sad because your first sentence, so I gave low importance to the remaining of the post... :-(
Emanuele.. ooops!! It's a misunderstanding chain, here!! ;-)))) hugs!
With all the due respect...this is very "schoolly" english..
Can't you guys just do better than this?
I was planning to have my test of English as a foreign language test, too. Reading this (and wiping the tears from my eyes, too... falling asleep... now seriously!) I decided against it.
Thanks, luv!
Dabo: I'm sure that you'd be great at that darn test, give it a try and you'll surely make it!
I'm sure you did great - I'll keep my fingers crossed your for!
Oh, and why the dripping sound?
I just came back here and noticed that my comment makes no sense and english is my first language!

I meant :"I'll keep my fingers crossed for you!"
Beth - Thank you so much. Wishing you all the best for your new job. Hugs
pizzi - I think it's because of the cat-clock..
...the results is a sort-of-annoying "something is leaking" sound which freaked out hubby and me "What the heck is that sound?" "the laptop is about to explode" "I think it's skype..." "did you close the kitchen tap?"
..ok guys.. the clock's ready to go... I'll switch it off in a few days... ;-)
Who the heck is hubby?
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